A Major Curveball

Hey friends.

Well where should I start. Life is pretty interesting. You make goals, you have plans and one event can change those. You do not always know why, but you have to eventually accept it. That being said, let me tell you about my last few weeks.

School up at BYU-Idaho was going great. We were having a fun, productive semester. I had met a lot of new guys and girls. I was successfully juggling school and two jobs and life was really in a good balance. I was pretty stoked on how everything was going. My good friend, Skyler Nelson, came back up to Rexburg, and it felt great to be reunited. We created a soccer team and football team with our friends and we were having a blast. Things were just panning out really well. I had never stayed in Rexburg for a winter, so I made an effort to save money and was on track to be able to actually afford to stay if I found a good job and no other internship offers came up else where.

Everything was great, until Oct 18. We had a soccer game that night, and our team was doing really good. We were one of the best teams in our league and we were having fun playing. I play defense, so I just like to boot the ball out and keep our side safe. I am not the best soccer player and I am not in shape either, and I think that led to my downfall. As i was going to safe the ball and kick it out, it happened. I kicked the ball with my left foot and in the same action landed on it after the kick. When my leg planted, my knee gave out and i heard a very gross noise. it sounded like someone crushing a plastic water bottle with their hands. I immediately fell over and called for a sub and crawled to the sideline. I knew this was bad. I have had two previous knee surgeries in high school for ACL and meniscus repair, and I think that this is what happened again. I could not bend it, or put any pressure. We did win the game, but I got home, and then called my mom and she wanted me to go to the hospital. That is when the pain and emotion set it. I became a wreck and was pretty sad. At the hospital I got X-rays, which didn't know anything ( i knew they wouldn't because i know i didn't break anything, it was ligaments) they gave me some pain meds a brace and sent me home with a surgeon to follow up with on Monday.

That weekend was spent in pain, lying on the couch, icing and elevating my knee. The swelling that occurred was the same as the previous times I messed my knee up, so I was positive I did the same thing again. I met with Dr. Mills on Monday. Got a scheduled MRI for Wednesday  He was pretty sure it was torn, both my acl and meniscus. So I had the MRI done, and got the results the next day. Dr. Mills confirmed the problems and talked with my mom via phone. I could put off surgery but would be in a wheelchair for the remainder of the semester. Or we could do surgery there and have to deal with recovery. Either way, any way it would suck.

That evening, a week from when the accident occurred, my mom called me. Her and my dad felt that the best possible solution would be for me to come home to Colorado, to do surgery, recover and defer from school or figure out what needed to happen as far as school work was concerned. I was pretty sad and emotional about it. But I met with all my teachers and was able to work it out so that I did not have to drop any classes and continue all the work from home. I am very blessed to let this happen. I was worried because it was right in the middle of the semester and it would have been very hard to have to defer and retake everything.

Friday and Saturday were my last days in Rexy for the Fall. We were able to have a blast and go to a Halloween party. We dressed up as Star Wars characters. I was a storm trooper. (see pics) I had my wheelchair, so I was a handicapped storm trooper. haha. But it was so fun to have a good time with my friends before I left. Dad flew into Idaho Falls on Saturday afternoon. He helped me pack up, took my roomies out to dinner and hung out with all my friends. It was so awesome to have all my friends meet him because he is freaking awesome and now they know where I get my weird, funny side from. But it was really cool to have that experience.

Sunday morning came and I went to sacrament to say goodbye to our ward. This bishopric has been the first bishopric that  I felt close to up here at school. They were my friends and I truly value them. It was pretty hard saying goodbye, but it needed to happen. Me and dad took off for Denver, drove through boring Wyoming and made it home around 10 at night.

Monday, I met with another surgeon. He confirmed what Mills said, and we scheduled surgery for November 8th. So now I am just waiting, being lazy, doing hw, blogging and watching old family tapes and videos. I am still able to do work for Poobah Marketing, which is also a blessing. But I have had a lot of time to think.

Like the title of this blog says, this was a major curve ball in my life. It was really hard and still sometimes is to think that I will have had three surgeries on the same knee for the same problem. Why?? Every time I have been home from school since my mission I have had some form of surgery ( tonsils, hernia, and now this). So why does this happen? I tried to sit there the night i found out i would be leaving Rexburg and whine and complain to myself. I tried to find self pity and question God's role in my life. I tried to be angry and hold onto the pain, but I could not. And I am thankful for that. I guess it is the faith and overall understanding of my purpose in life. I cannot get hung up on problems I face. Everyone had trials and problems. Mine just happen to be surgery and health problems. But I cannot sit here today and tell you that I blame God. I do not, and will not. This is something for me to learn from and hopefully grow from, and I know I will.

I can not stay angry, it almost seems impossible to live that way. I will have the surgery, I will move forward and I will have to give up some of the things I love. I will give up certain activities because in the long run it does not matter. I would rather heal properly and prepare for my future family and career than do this again. So no more soccer, probably no more snowboarding. I will need to harness my activities into exercise, biking and swimming. I will make it work.

But out of all of this, I just want people to understand that there is no reason to blame God and hold anger against Him or anyone else because you will look back on it and realize it was a small trial in a life full of miracles. My life, the people in it and the experiences I have had are miracles and I am thankful for the Lord and His tender mercies upon me.

I love you all and hope that you find the strength to let go of pain, anger and hard feelings you are feeling. I hope that you find and understand your purpose and overall experience in this life. It is wonderful and amazing, so find it. :)

Enjoy pics below!

My left quad is dying from lack of use. haha

Just happens that I wrecked a moped and cut up my bad knee a month prior to this. Any chance its connected to my current problem?? let the judge decide.

being bored at home. i am becoming a pro at this.

This is what I was for Halloween

Shelbourne 9 (minus graham, he was darth maul)

we found them on amazon.com and other cool sites. click pic below to see other cool costumes!